First: my new year’s resolutions did NOT work out as planned. Yes, I am running. Yes, I am buying seeds and dirt. NO, I am not going to the gym every day. And even though I’ve been trying to eat better, I still have a tendency to carb-load. I guess it’s true when they say that you just can’t change over night. Maybe my goal should be to change all of these things by next new years. That seems a little more manageable.
I’m also partway through my second semester of senior year, and let me tell you right now: it’s a nightmare. I love my classes, and I love what I’m learning in them. Sometimes I just have no motivation though. Now I always thought I wouldn’t succumb to senioritis just because I would be so dedicated.
Senioritis is probably the worst feeling and the best feeling I’ve ever had all mixed together. I’m extremely ecstatic that I’m graduating in May. This feeling of ecstasy (not to be confused with the drug…I’m sure the effect is nowhere near the same) rushes to my head when I’m in class or doing homework, and BOOM! I don’t want to do what I should be doing to be productive. This would all be well and good if these were classes I could skate through. And maybe one of them is…but not all of them. In fact, I need pass all three of my Spanish classes to graduate. And I need to excel in my history class to boost my future career. Now, don’t get me wrong, I’m definitely going to pass all of them. And I’m going to put all of my effort into my history class. But this mix of excitement and stress leads to a lot of weird nights. Let me describe the scenario for you.
It was a dark and stormy night. (Ok, maybe just dark.) As I sat before the fire in my luxurious (read: decent) townhouse, I thought to myself, wow…this paper will be so cool! I’m going to write something really moving about…legalizing prostitution…in Spanish. Then comes the inevitable hour of moaning to whoever will listen about how much I DON’T want to write the paper that could be amazingly moving. At around 10pm I’ll snap out the paper after copious amounts of dictionary checking. This occurs every Tuesday night in my townhouse. You can witness the exhibit this Tuesday: join me for cocktails before witnessing my descent into chaos.
Tonight, however, is a special case. This is the night my four to six page paper of a survey of oral histories will be born. At the moment I have a shocking two pages written. As it is five minutes away from 10pm as I write this, I am indeed impressed with myself. This is an interesting mix of both ingenuity and procrastination. So here I sit, once again in front of the fire, practicing my writing skills on my blog instead of on my oral history survey. Well…I guess this is simply another way of being productive. Either way, I WILL finish it, and it WILL be good. In the meantime though I’m going to see just how much I can stress myself out before actually writing this paper.